Quotable

"It doesn't mean anything. Like "RamaLamaDingDong" or "Give Peace a Chance"."

- Homer Simpson

Fun while it lasted.....

The Vikings recent run of 6 straight victories came to an end Sunday in an 18-3 loss to the Steelers.

My hero, Brad Johnson, finally showed his mortality with a couple of bad interceptions, but hell, even "Fran the Man" had a bad day here and there.

For the first time in years, the Vikings have what appears to be a competent defense. I hope they keep the defense together, sign Brad Johnson for next year, let Culpepper go and spend their money on a kick-ass running back.

Furthermore...

I am the only quarterback in the history of the NFL to have completed a touchdown pass to myself.

Who am I?

What the....?

The Minnesota Vikings are 3-0 in November after defeating Green Bay last night at Lambeau field. The Vikings leading receiver last night was tight end Jermaine Wiggins with 7 receptions for 67 yards.

Wiggins has spindly legs and a beer belly.

....and so say all of us

Brad Johnson is the best quarterback the Vikings have had since Fran Tarkenton.

Can you pass the 8th grade math test

***You Passed 8th Grade Math***

Congratulations, you got 10/10 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Math?

Horse Talk

2 yr. old colt "Justawalkinthepark" , Joe Bravo up, breaks his maiden going away by 7 1/2 lengths earning a "90" Beyer rating for the effort in only his second start.

"Justawalkinthepark"s syndicate ownership includes a friend of the Free Advice blog. The colts trainer believes this colt may be Kentucky Derby material. The colt earned a 77 Beyer rating in the first race of his career, which is a better rating than half of last years Derby entrants in their 1st career starts.

McLogic

O's release Sidney Ponson?

Any one have any concrete information regarding this speculation?

So there!

If in any figure AacE, terminated by the right lines Aa, AE, and the curve acE, there be inscribed any number of parallelograms Ab, Bc, Cd, &c., comprehended under equal bases AB, BC, CD, &c., and the sides, Bb, Cc, Dd, &c., parallel to one side Aa of the figure; and the parallelograms aKbl, bLcm, cMdn, &c., are completed. Then if the breadth of those parallelograms be supposed to be diminished, and their number to be augmented in infinitum; I say, that the ultimate ratios which the inscribed figure AkbLcMdD, the circumscribed figure AalbmcndoE, and curvilinear figure abased, will have to one another, are ratios of equality.

- Sir Isaac Newton (Principia Mathematica)

Methinks thou dost protest too much

Sometime after World War I, Albert Einstein became an outspoken supporter of Zionism. This made him highly unpopular in certain circles. His theories came under attack; an anti-Einstein organization was set up. One man was convicted of inciting others to murder Einstein (for which he was fined 6 dollars).

When a book was published entitled 100 Authors Against Einstein, he retorted, "If I were wrong, then one would have been enough!"

- Stephen Hawking (A Brief History of Time)

There she is......

I watched the end of the movie "The Freshman" on television the other day. Matthew Broderick is a college freshman who unwittingly gets in cahoots with the mob. Marlon Brando plays "Carmine Sabbatini", the head mobster.

The climactic scene is a lavish dinner party hosted by Carmine Sabbatini. The entertainment for the dinner party is none other than Bert Parks (he of Miss America Pageant host fame). One of the numbers Bert sings for the dinner guests is "Maggies Farm" and I must say that the very notion of the Miss America Pageant host singing a Bob Dylan tune, coupled with the contrast of styles between Parks and Dylan is at least as captivating as an automobile wreck. Perhaps even a train wreck.

From the friendly folks at Jack Daniels....

Hmmm.....

"Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school."

- Albert Einstein

Witnessed today

Sidney Ponson...traded?

ESPN News is reporting that the portly Aruban Knight has been traded to San Diego for Phil Nevin. Thoughts?

pi

59-year-old Akira Haraguchi of Japan recently broke the world record for the recited number of digits of Pi. Haraguchi-san recited an amazing 83,431 digits of Pi during a 13-hour overnight stretch. See The PI World Ranking List for more records for memorizing PI, e and the sqare root of two while or while not juggling.

Sometimes the best things in life are free....

Hmmm.......

Tiger Woods has won the Masters golf tournament at Augusta National 4 times. He took the green jacket in 1997, 2001, 2002 and most recently in 2005.

Augusta National performed extensive renovations to the golf course in 1998 and 2003.

Augusta National is at it again.

snake venom...

...ever wonder why its soooo deadly? I'm using it in my chemistry research to chop up DNA... well, not just chop it up, more like mutilate (sp?) it! Of the two species of snake venom I'm using, both completely tear up DNA in to its basic units. Remember, DNA is the blueprint for everything biological. So you can imagine someone may not make it when a snake bite turns that blue print into paper shreds.

Will Smith

Okay, so I was watching some movies at the beach, and Will Smith popped up in a couple. Yeah, he's more famous for his tv role in the Fresh Prince of Bel Aire..... but he's done some cool movies also (and he raps... but lets not talk about that). Below I ranked his movies from the best to the worst, but I think I'm missing a movie or two. Let me know if you can think of them. (Also, I never watched Ali, but I figured it couldn't be worse then the ones below it. Also, I haven't seen his new movie "Hitch." It seemed like a chick flick... so maybe one of these days I'll get a girl to come over and we'll rent it. Thus, it's not ranked.

1. Independence Day
2. Men in Black I
3. Bad Boys I
4. iRobot
5. Ali
6. Bad Boys II
7. The Legand of Bagger Vance
8. Men in Black II
9. Wild Wild West

Vocabulary

Reintarnation, (n.): Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

Vocabulary

Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating.

The discovery of the bozone is a significant achievement, as it substantiates the following theory which now becomes an immutable physical law:

There are no stupid questions, only stupid people who ask quesions.

Why is 18 holes the golf tradition?

During a discussion among the club membership board at St. Andrews in 1858, a senior member pointed out that it takes exactly 18 shots to drink a fifth of Scotch. By limiting oneself to one shot of Scotch per hole, the round of golf was completed when the Scotch ran out.

Good Advice. and it's Free. 

More Vocab

Bore: [One] who deprives you of solitude without providing you with company.
~Gian Vincenzo Gravina

Voodoo Boy Says...

The Red Sox victory in the 2004 World Series did not break the "curse of the Bambino". Their dramatic 4 game sweep after falling behind 3-0 in the ALCS passed the curse on to the Yankees.

More Vocabulary

BENEFACTOR, n.
One who makes heavy purchases of ingratitude, without, however, materially affecting the price, which is still within the means of all.

Vocabulary Update

JUSTICE, n.
A commodity which is a more or less adulterated condition the State sells to the citizen as a reward for his allegiance, taxes and personal service.

A Memorial Day Roundup

Was anyone else literally EXHAUSTED on Tuesday after the Memorial Day festivities at Grandma Mentzers?

I think you'd be hardpressed to find another family picnic that offers (a). golf, (b). wiffleball, (c). horseshoes, (d). poker.

Like my wise Uncle Stan said, "It's like the county fair. You can't do it all in one day."

A Joke

There are always two hundred thirty nine beans in a bowl of chilli.

Because one more would make it too farty.

Vote Early, Vote Often

Voting is under way for the Major League Baseball All Star game. You can vote online at www.mlb.com or www.orioles.com .

Vote for:

Brian Roberts, 2nd base, American League

Roberts leads all AL 2nd basemen in Batting Average, Stolen Bases, Walks, Total Bases, Runs Batted In, Home Runs, Triples, Hits and Runs Scored and has a .977 Fielding Percentage.

Miguel Tejada, shortstop, American League

Tejada leads all AL SS in Total Bases, Runs Batted In, Home Runs, Doubles and Hits and has a .968 Fielding Percentage

Melvin Mora, 3rd Base, American League

Mora leads all AL 3rd basemen in Stolen Bases, Doubles and Hits. He is 2nd among 3rd basemen in Batting Average, Home Runs and Runs Batted In. He has a .967 Fielding Percentage (4th best among starting 3rd basemen).

Vote for these 3 players. Do it. Do it now. Do it every time you go online.

Writing

So here's the deal. I plan on ranting and raving about my writing class. I had to write a paper where I analyse two texts that were written by the same author. These texts have the same theme of lonliness throughout America. Anyhow the texts are from two different genres. One is an essay, and the other was a short story. In my paper, I analysed the effectiveness of the genres in conveying their theme to the audience (me).

Basically my essay said that the essay was full of bullshit and that the author just tried to make herself sound more intellegent than she was. Also I said taht the short story got the theme off very effectively by keeping the reader (again me) interested. Now I said all of this in a much nicer way. I analysed the differences between the two. I also went to the Learning Resource Center and met with a writing tutor about my paper. When I left that, I revised my paper mechanics, the grammar, and all that other good stuff. I turned in what I thought to be an A paper, B+ at worst.

Anyhow, I know the tutur who helped me with the paper, so when I got the paper back, I went to show her how I did. (The tutor is Jimmy my best friends gf). Anyhow I got a C on the paper, which is the same grade I've gotten on EVERY PAPER for the ENTIRE CLASS. As Jenny and I went over the paper and read the teachers comments, we realized that the teacher wasn't taking poings off for my mechanics, or my organization, or my grammar, but for my ideas. Basicall I lost credit on the paper because I felt that the essay was written just to sound smart. I stated in my paper that the essay tends to lose the reader because it doesn't flow well. I also stated that the essay didn't flow well because it was written to "sound smart". The teacher responded with "The only reason a reader would get lost in this essay is if they lacked the critical thinking skill necessary to follow it."

Well in general I think I got a bullshit grade. Also, I have to re-submit the paper, and in order to get the grade I need, i'm going to have to put in HER ideas. I don't want to do it, but I don't think I have any other choice. I am VERY angry about all of this.

P.S. I have a new girlfriend for those of you who are behind on my love life. Her name is Marcie.

self explanatory

Bad Timing

I'm in Louisville, Ky today and tomorrow but I won't be here next weekend.

Quote

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
-- John Benfield

Woof

The Cowboy and the Yuppie

The Cowboy and The Yuppie

=========================

A cowboy was herding his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly

a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban

sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the

cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have

in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at

his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure. Why

not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,

connects it to his AT&T cell phone and surfs to a NASA page on the

Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to

get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another

NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution

photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop

and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg,

Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot

that the image has been processed and the data stored.

He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected

Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas. He uploads

all of this data via an email on his Blackberry, and after a few

minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-

tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the

cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,"

says the cowboy. He watches the young man select one of the

animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the

trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you

exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says,

"Okay, why not?"

"You're a consultant." says the cowboy. "Wow! That's correct,"

says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

"No guessing required," answered the cowboy. "You showed up

here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an

answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you

don't know anything about my business."

"Now give me back my DOG."

I thought this was cool!

Okay, so did you ever wonder how the heck plants knew they needed to grow taller? Seriously, haven't you ever wondered why some plants grow until they hit sunlight and then bearly grow at all until they are overshadowed by another plant... at which time the shoot up until they are the tallest again? Trees in particular do this.

Well, it all has to do with a molecule called a cytochrome. This molecule is "C" shaped. But when its bombarded with photons (light energy in packet form) the center bond of the molecule absorbs the energy and twists so that the molecule is "S" shaped. When the molecule is "S" shaped the metabolism of the plant shifts from growing to storing, so it starts storing up sugars. But when the plant is overshadowed by another plant, there isn't enough energy to keep the molecule in the "S" shape, so it returns to the "C" shape, which then binds to certain proteins, setting off a cascade of changes and the plant starts growing taller again!

Exciting? I KNOW!

The Boss means business!

Buddy Groom to the rescue!

Nerd Research Contest

The history of the software industry is filled with acronyms. One popular acronym component is "Yet Another". YACC is a Unix acronym for "Yet Another Compiler-Compiler". YAHOO is a world wide web acronym for "Yet Another Hierarchically Officious Oracle".

I've given the two easy ones. Can you find anymore?

Saw Update

A penny saved is a penny to squander.

A man is known by the company that he organizes.

A bad workman quarrels with the man who calls him that.

A bird in the hand is worth what it will bring.

Better late than before anybody has invited you.

Example is better than following it.

Half a loaf is better than a whole one if there is much else.

Think twice before you speak to a friend in need.

What is worth doing is worth the trouble of asking somebody to do it.

Least said is soonest disavowed.

He laughs best who laughs least.

Speak of the Devil and he will hear about it.

Of two evils choose to be the least.

Strike while your employer has a big contract.

Where there's a will there's a won't.

Some humor for the day

A tourist walks into a curio shop in San Francisco. Looking around at everything, he notices a very lifelike life-sized bronze statue of a rat. It has no price tag, but is so striking that he decides he must have it. He takes it to the owner and asks, "How much for the bronze rat?"

The owner replies, "$12 for the rat and $100 for the story". The tourist gives the man $12 and says, I'll just take the rat, you can keep the story."

As he walks down the street carrying his bronze rat, he notices that a few real rats have crawled out of the alleys and sewers and begun following him down the street. This is disconcerting, and he begins walking faster. But within a couple of blocks, the herd of rats behind him has grown to hundreds, and they begin squealing. He begins to trot toward the Bay, looking around to see that the rats now number in the MILLIONS, and are ! squealing and coming toward him fster and faster.

Concern, even scared, he runs to the edge of the Bay, and throws the bronze rat as far out into the water as he can. Amazingly, the millions of rats all jump into the Bay after it, and are all drowned.

The man walks back to the curio shop.

"Ah ha," says the owner, "you have come back for the story?"

"No," says the man, "I came back to see if you have a bronze Democrat, a bronze Muslim cleric & anything French.

I am now, officially, an award winning journalist

Some good news for you folks,

Two Fridays ago, I was named the "Gettysburg Times Employee of the Quarter."

Not sure what I did to earn the recognition. Guess I'll find out.

the perks: Get my own parking spot for three months, a golfing jacket, a bonus, a trophy, a plaque, and an inivation to the Board of Directors Dinner in May.

why it's ironic: I interviewed for a job at WHP in harrisburg a week before this happened.

~ SCOT ~

I Am Diggin This City Life!

I got my own cable, and watch every single Oriole game in 2005!

Sure beats the times when I could only watch games on WJZ.

my "Opening Day" experience

greetings Free Advice gang,

as you all know, i was scheduled to join local media from the Pa. midstate and Md. area for Opening Day 2005 at Camden Yards.

however, the day got off to a bad start when i was called at 8:30 a.m. and told our credentials hadn't come in the mail. after a few calls, we learned (THE DAY OF THE FREAKIN GAME) that credentials aren't given to "small papers", and that "small papers" have to apply for credentials on a game-by-game basis.

As a result, we didn't go.

Amazing that on the four forms we had to fill out (beginning as early as January) to get credentials, not one of them said "small papers" had to apply for credentials on a game-by-game basis.

I do not have high regards for the Oriole front office at this point (considering that we talked to TEN different that morning, none of whom relayed the message of what we were calling about onto each other).

Oh well.

Later crew,

Pitz

O's update

Given the O's series with the Yanks this past weekend, it appears that Ray does have it figured out for 12 and even 7. Apparently, he's still scratching his head about 5.

O's Bomb Bronxers

Tis true. The O's came up big in their 1st matchup of the season with the Yankees, knocking the Yankees into a tie for last place in the AL East.

O's win one

and are on the same pace as last year getting a win by the starter in the first game of the season. The 2nd win came on 4/16 last year, so let's see if they can get to 2 faster this year.

Go O's

vibronically

Yeah... its a real word. Although Webster's may not agree.

Who is the first baseball player suspended for Steroids?

Your answer right here. This may be a good trivia question in a few years.

Play Ball!

Hey!

Your shoe is untied.

Auld Lang Syne

A hearty handshake from an old friend.

Whatever happened....

to Rich Ankiel.

Well, he's still with the Cardinals and yesterday, he threw a strike.

Coming Attraction!

Free Advice contributor Ken (pictured above) is publishing a new blog - Pitchfork Diary - which chronicles his adventures at the track.

One Good Deed......

Deserves Another

How many wins will the O's Starters get?

With the O's starting staff just about finalized and Ponson dropping to the number 4 spot, how many wins will the O's starters get? I believe they had 52 last year, will they improve by the 20 games that Ray Miller is talking about. Let's hope so.

My guess is 61.

Security Update

This won't make you fee secure, but it will make you laugh.

Baseball Hall of Fame

With a previous post by Free Advice's Ken back in January and with the recent news of Robbie Alomar's retirement and a story yesterday of a straw poll vote for Mark McGwire and Barry Bonds, do any of these players make the hall. Based on the numbers, I think that they are all first ballot hall-of-famers. But Robbie has the "spitting" incident, and McGwire and Bonds are linked to steroids. What is the opinion of our Free Advice community?

Hmm.... Good Point

If France still lives, who can deny food and water to Terri Shciavo?

- ScrappleFace

Curriculum Vitae

Since a member of this blog will be covering Major League Baseball on Opening Day, I imagine an opportunity and hereby submit my qualifications for same.

Do you need a photographer?

I have covered Major League Baseball as a photographer for the Williamsport Gazette. I sat in the 3rd row at Three Rivers Stadium and saw Vince Coleman of the St. Louis Cardinals set the MLB record of 38 consecutive successful stolen base attempts.

My rates are excellent and there were no complaints about my work. I have a reference.

What say ye?

San Diego and the like

Okay, so I just got back from San Diego a few days ago. It 60 degrees out side and there were like 3 clouds in the sky and all the locals were complaining about how aweful the weather was. The water in the Pacific Ocean is very cold, fyi, but the waves are big. And if you buy a poncho, don't wear it past the bars. The drunks WILL make fun of you... found this out first hand.

Uncle Stan...

...you make an appearance in this Saturday's "Reporters Notebook" in the Gettysburg Times.

Hope you enjoy it.

Somebody Gets to Cover the Orioles on Opening Day for the Gettysburg Times...

It's true. I have a press pass and will be attending Camden Yards on Opening Day, 2K5.

Rodrigo versus Zito.

Read about it in the gburgtimes!

Drilling Update

Upcoming Senate vote on drilling for oil in the Alaskan ANWR province brings to mind this quote from Senator Howell Heflin of Alabama in 1990, upon seeing a picture of Ted Kennedy in a compromising position with a woman while floating in a boat:

"Well, Teddy, I see you've changed your position on offshore drilling."

Fantasy Baseball Update

Ok, we have 10 teams signed up, the league can handle two more. If you want in, sign up this week, I will set the league to a ready status on Friday, which means the draft will occur over the weekend so have your draft lists ready.

If you want to sign up, go to the following link Yahoo Fantasy Baseball. Sign up for a free team and join the league

League ID is 168969
Password is cdra

Organic Letters

My research finally came out in publication... which is exciting for me. You can check it out by clicking the link. Just scroll down, its the 9th one from the bottom entitled, "Syntheses of Silatranyl- and Germatranyluridines."

Cool beans!

Composer Update

Most popular titles from Aram Khachaturian. None of these will be a' moi.

Lefty

Heyyyy! Lefty really can swing both ways.

Fantasy Baseball

For those baseball nuts out there, I've just created a custom Fantasy Baseball League on Yahoo. To join go to the following site Yahoo Fantasy Baseball . Create a team, and join the league

League ID is 168969
Password is cdra

The league can have a max of 12 teams, I would like to see at least 10 in the league. So join the fun and invite your friends.

If you have questions, let me know.

O's Update

I suppose Tsunami Syd would have held out for more money if he knew this was going to happen. Looks to me like our boy has til May 10th to pony up the cash. Hopefully, the lightness in his wallet will motivate him to pitch well.

Brush with Fame

Free Advice is an active participant of the international blogosphere as of March 1, 2005. Congratulations to Mikey-P for submitting a post of interest to someone outside the membership of the Free Advice blog. Author Brad Steel has posted a comment well worth reading. Has anyone read his book?

Havin' fun now, ain't we?

Rust does not conduct electricity...

...very well, at least. This is in response to a short conversation I had with Stan a few months ago. My car was not working very well... some times it worked and sometimes it didn't, may be a better way to put it. And one of those times it seemed to want to work I drove'er over to Stan's place to let him and my Dad look at it. We determined that most of what was under the hood was rusted over, to which Stan replied, "Shouldn't matter. I'd think rust should conduct electricity (in reference to all the wires connected to my car battery). Mike, what do you think?" Being a chemistry major, I thought this should be something I should know. And I didn't... a common trend in my chemistry career. The point being, I do now know, that rust will not conduct electricity very well. Oxygen is a very electronegative atom, meaning it doesn't like sharing its electrons. And rust is the bonding of oxygen to metals, usually iron. And since the epitome of electic theory centers on a metal's ability to share electrons, oxygen will certainly hinder that ability.

Hopefully that cleared it up for everyone. I know I've been concerned for some time.

Jamie: Prom Date?

Jamie Lynn Pitzer, I've been hearing that you have a prom date?

(1). Is this true?

(2). How comes I wasn't notified?

Soup to Nuts

What is the origin of the expression, "soup to nuts"? Who serves nuts at the end of a meal? Did nuts used to be dessert item?

What the @%!#$!# is going on here?

Der Spiegel questions Germany and Europe and says things about Bush and America which are not condescending.

Give til it hurts..... (or How to make a good impression first day on the job)

The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building and was additionally annoyed to learn that the regular organist had taken ill and an inexperienced organist had been conscripted at the last minute.

The substitute had many questions for the minister with regard to the conduct of the service. "Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently. "But, you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances."

During the service, the minister said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up."

At that moment, the substitute organist played "The Star Spangled Banner."

O's pitching takes a hit

or does it? That is the debate for this piece of news.

Another Ray Miller-ism

For the record, I recall telling Uncle Stan and Pappy Mentzer during one of our dinner conversations last year that bringing back Ray Miller was our best pick-up/acquisition (save Tejada) the last five years.

Now, onto another one of his Spring Training quotes. I love the guy's enthusiasm. He could make Jamie a 10-game winner.

Ray Miller: "I hate it when a guy gives up a homerun and says it was a good pitch. A good pitch is an out."

Innuendo

This is from a childrens' show!

Mmm..... Cow Good

Main Entry: buc·ca·neer
Function: noun
Etymology: French boucanier
1 : any of the freebooters preying on Spanish ships and settlements especially in the West Indies in the 17th century; broadly : PIRATE
2 : an unscrupulous adventurer especially in politics or business

As Webster informs, the term buccaneer is derived from the French boucanier which translates to "a drier of beef". What the....????

Well, back in the Day...

Some of the West Indies islands, especially Hispaniola, were almost overrun with wild cattle of various kinds, and this was owing to the fact that the Spaniards had killed off nearly all the natives, and so had left the interior of the islands to the herds of cattle which had increased rapidly. There were a few settlements on the seacoast, but the Spaniards did not allow the inhabitants of these to trade with any nation but their own, and consequently the people were badly supplied with the necessities of life.

But the trading vessels which sailed from Europe to that part of the Caribbean Sea were manned by bold and daring sailors, and when they knew that Hispaniola contained an abundance of beef cattle, they did not hesitate to stop at the little sea ports to replenish their stores. The natives of the island were skilled in the art of preparing beef by smoking and drying it.

But so many vessels came to Hispaniola for beef that there were not enough people on the island to do all the hunting and drying that was necessary, so these trading vessels frequently anchored in some quiet cove, and the crews went on shore and devoted themselves to securing a cargo of beef - not only enough for their own use, but for trading purposes; thus they became known as "beef driers," or buccaneers.

When the Spaniards heard of this new industry which had arisen within the limits of their possessions, they pursued the vessels of the buccaneers wherever they were seen, and relentlessly destroyed them and their crews. But there were not enough Spanish vessels to put down the trade in dried beef; more European vessels- generally English and French- stopped at Hispaniola; more bands of hunting sailors made their way into the interior. When these daring fellows knew that the Spaniards were determined to break up their trade, they became more determined that it should not be broken up, and they armed themselves and their vessels so that they might be able to make a defense against the Spanish men-of-war.

Thus a state of maritime warfare grew up in the waters of the West Indies between Spain and the buccaneers; and from being obliged to fight, the buccaneers became glad to fight.

- Frank R. Stockton (Buccaneers & Pirates of Our Coast)

O's Update

Q: Who drinks the most milk?

A: Cow Ripken

It's Turkey Season

Do we have any suggestions for our friends in Cleveland?

I know what you've been wondering...

...and I've been wondering the same thing. Why the heck is Mercury a liquid??? None of the other heavy metals are! Well, wonder no more! It's actually pretty cool. I'm not sure how familiar you are with molecular orbitals and valence bonding theory, so let me try to explain without them. Basically, every atom has certain layers of electrons, kinda like the planets orbiting around the sun; only instead of having one planet in each orbit, you can put either 2, 6, 10, or 14 electrons in a certain orbit. If that orbit happens to not be full, then any electrons in the unfilled orbit can be used to bond with another atom and make a molecule. The other heavy metals use this very principle to link together into solids. Well, it just so happens that mercury is the perfect size and shape that special relativity takes an effect on the electrons it would normally use to bond and they are moving soooo fast that due to Einstein's famous equation they gain mass because they are moving at a large fraction of the speed of light. Because they gain mass, they move closer to the nucleus of the atom, and in turn, are hidden under the filled orbitals of the atom, and thus are unable to bond. So mercury remains a liquid with the metallic luster of all the metals we see every day!

Okay, okay! I'll get a life some day and find something interesting to post on here. Until then, enjoy!

This should brighten your day..

How NOT to perform a motorcycle jump. If you want to see more, go to this site.

Cool Baby Name Software

Here is a Java applet with a remarkable user interface for analyzing the popularity of names over the years. If you can get it to run, type your name and check it out.

Itunes Update

I've always liked the Sheryl Crow songs I've heard on the radio, so I decided to buy a couple of them. While looking over the selections on Itunes for Sheryl Crow songs, I discovered that she recorded (live) a cover of the Bob Dylan ramble "Tombstone Blues". As this is my favorite Dylan song, I decided to investigate further.

Sheryl covers "Tombstone Blues" in a style reminiscent of Dylans' original ramble. I bought the song and, although she cuts it short (she only performs half of the verses), it is still entertaining listening to an artist, one with a singing voice, performing a Dylan ramble. Kudos to Sheryl Crow! She moves up several notches in my estimation for having the cahones to sing "Tombstone Blues".

BTW - one other artist has a cover of "Tombstone Blues" on Itunes. The artist is Tim O'Brien and the tune is a country version.

O's Update

Another season with Ray Miller will definitely help this guy.

Itunes Update

I want to buy "Swingin on a Star" performed by Frank Sinatra. I can't find it. Nuts!

Not good enough for the Milky Way Galaxy!

Here's a cool story. For the first time ever, scientists have seen a star escape the gravitational confines of the Milky Way Galaxy. The star probably got lobbed out of our galaxy by a black hole when it approached at just the perfect angle to use the centripital force exerted by the black hole to circle around and get thrown away. Meanwhile, its poor companion star wasn't so lucky and is most likely trapped forever in the black hole.

Super Bowl Update

The York Daily Record reports:

Fans stayed away in droves from the Eagles return to Philadelphia.

In the spirit of David Letterman, I wish to determine if this is something or nothing.

Is it something or nothing that the fans stayed away?
Is it something or nothing that the York Daily Record reported that the fans stayed away?
Is it something or nothing that I read the York Daily Record?

The Yanks get another one...

Buddy Groom signs with the Yanks. I guess he figured "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em".

PETA on the warpath

Save the cows and own a car without leather seats. People Eating Tasty Animals scores again.

Oh No!

Bill Gates is at it again. Everytime MicroSoft makes this type of announcement (i.e. there's a big problem and we're going to fix it) we all get screwed.

As a member of the software industry for the past 20 years, I feel partly responsible. How do we start an "Orange" revolution in the software industry?

Motown Bengals looking to roar

The Tigers bag Mags.

Itunes Update

I finally broke down and created an Itunes account for myself. I know I'm way behind the times on this i.e. I might be the last person on Earth to have done this. But anyway, That's what I did. I bought the following 9 songs and burned 'em on a CD.

Title	Artist
Whiskey River	Willie Nelson
Danger Man	David Bromberg
Man of Constant Sorrow	Allison Krause & Union Station
You're So Vain	Carley Simon
Let Me Play With Your Yo Yo	Moses Rascoe & Ken Werner
Long Cool Woman (in a Black Dress)	The Hollies
Dirty Work	Steely Dan
Breakdown (Live at the Wiltern Theater)	Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers
Mack the Knife	Bobby Darin

For around $10 I now have a CD that would have cost me around $130 in the old days.

Thank God that Steve Jobs has found something that a computer is good for.

Ever put a pet in the microwave???

Because the Pentagon has developed such a weapon to battle Iraqi insurgents. Microwaves are pretty cool, and work by emitting an electro-magnetic wave that is the same wavelength as the vibration of the hydrogens in a water molecule. As the wave passes, it gives the vibrating hydrogens of the water molecule a little extra push, making them vibrate faster and faster. That vibrational energy transforms into kinectic energy, which is the heat of the food. This is why only things containing water heat up when placed in a microwave. Microwaves also have other effects, which aren't as helpful, and why you shouldn't put metal things in the microwave.

Now back to my point. The army has developed a big microwave machine, and are planning to use it as a tool to combate insurgents that use crowds to hide when they launch their explosives. Basically, this microwave machine sends electro-magnetic radiation into a crowd of people causing their skin to burn and their bodies to heat up.

The link is below. I couldn't remember how to do that fancy trick where you make a word into a link.

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Update: Mike - check out this post by editing it. By placing the text of the URL into the Link dialogue box in the post editor, it makes your title the actual link.

Kinky Update

Richard Freidman throws his hat into the ring in a bid to halt the "wussification" of Texas.

MAD COW DISEASE!

Here is an interesting tid bit that I just picked up today. Did you know that Mad Cow Disease is neither caused by bacteria or virus??? Its actually just a protein... I KNOW! A protein! And I know what you are thinking. Our body has millions of different proteins in it and none of them do anything bad... what exactly is so special about this cow protein???

Well, proteins are very special, huge molecules. Whats amazing about proteins is that it doesn't matter what the hell your protein is made up of, the only important thing is the way its bends and folds, and it is that bending and folding that causes the most basic functions of our body to work. For example, some proteins bend into spirals... and then insert themselves into cell membranes. That spiral then acts as a tunnel, in a otherwise closed off membrane, for nutrients and water to pass through.

The devistating thing about this Mad Cow protein is that it disrupts the bending and folding of most other proteins! So now you see where I'm going with this. And since your proteins aren't bent or folded in the correct geometries, your most basic bodily functions no longer work... and you die.

Coming soon... the avian flu.

Iraq Update

Is the election in Iraq a triumph of Clinton policy? Should the GOP say so?

O's Update

For those among us looking for a little pick me up.

Go figure...

Neither Biglerville or Eastern was invited to the AA team tourney this year.

I think the championship is up for grabs... and I would find my way to Hershey to see Bermudian and Delone wrestle in it. But I think Brandywine could find its way there and even Donegal.

I would have liked to have seen that Donegal/Eastern match take place.

Way to go Arnie!

Lest anyone ever think that Arnold Palmer could be outdone by Tiger Woods, it looks like there's still some life left in the old putter.

O's update (re: Say it ain't So...sa)

If Ray is happy, I suppose I should be happy too.

The encouraging quote from the above link is:

Maybe I'm putting my foot in my mouth, but if you give me eight runs a game, I'll figure out the rest.

- Ray Miller (Orioles pitching coach/Svengali)

Ray Miller has made a bold statement with regard to his lowly regarded pitching staff for the 2nd time this offseason. I've never heard Ray Miller talk like this. The first statement he made was that if his staff pitches next season like they pitched the 2nd half of last season, the Orioles will win 20 more games. Coincidentally, Ray Miller joined the O's staff just prior to mid-season last year. Last season, the O's won 78 games. This statement from Miller basically translates to If these guys pitch the way I tell 'em to pitch, the Orioles will win 98 games.

I don't know if Ray actually believes this, or if he's just trying to put hinies in the seats. There is evidence to indicate that he believes it. In the 70's and early 80's (Miller's first stint as Orioles pitching coach), the financial disparity between the Orioles franchise and that of the Yankees and Red Sox was the same as it is today. Yet in those days, the Orioles routinely contended for the division title and won their fair share of same. It is reasonable to suspect that 98 victories can win the division.

It does not feel like the old Orioles glory days to me, but maybe it does to Ray Miller. Here's hoping this Rasputin isn't just yanking my chain.

Yankee or Dixie

Take the test
Post your result

Who saw this coming?

I guess if the O's aren't going to stop them from scoring runs, they better be able to score a lot. They must think that Slammin Sammy Sosa might be able to help them score more, unless he can pitch too.

Another Wrestling Update: Bermudian Springs at Biglerville

Results are in from the 01/27/05 battle at Biglerville High School.

Bermudian 31
Biglerville 29

Biglerville led 29-26 going into the final bout at 160.

Both teams deducted one team point for unsportsmanlike conduct by coaches.

SUMMARY: Biglerville wrestled the best match they could have. Bermudian will go far in the DIII Team Tourney...

A little funny

A man was walking down the street when he was approached by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.

The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead?"

"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.

"Will you use it to gamble instead of buying food?" the man asked.

"No, I don't gamble," the homeless man said. "I need everything I can get just to stay alive."

"Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.

"Are you nuts?!?" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"

"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

The homeless man was astounded.

"Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."

The man replied, "That's okay. I just want her to see what a man looks like who's given up drinking, gambling, and golf."

HS Wrestling Results are In!!!

01/26/05: From the CannerDome in Biglerville

Biglerville 37

Hanover 19

Hooooooly Cow.

O's Update

I guess we all suspected that this was coming.

BREAKING NEWS

My blogging sources have informed me that a nuclear powerplant in Michigan has been shut down indefinitely for releasing 80 gallons of waste into the environment. No word yet on whether or not the waste was radio active.

This information has not made its way to the corporate media yet.

It could be very fake info. But you saw it here first.

Johnny Carson - RIP

In memory of Johnny, here's an audio link to the Copper Clapper Caper , a bit Johnny did with Jack Webb (Dragnet's Joe Friday) on the Tonight Show.

Buckley pans Bush

Here.

O's still hangin around

More promising gossip for the O's faithful.

O's Update

Some gossip to raise the hopes of the faithful.

Nemesis Update

Free Advice contributor and NCAA collegiate wrestler dsterner has a new nemesis in the person of Wade Ginter - a junior 133 lb wrestler for Albright College.

Our contributor is currently a freshmen 133 lb'er at York College. During our man's high school career, his nemesis was one Lance Roycroft from neighboring Kennard Dale High School. In 5 contests spanning 2 seasons, dsterner failed to record a victory over Roycroft. The fifth and final contest was engaged during dsterner's junior year in high school (Roycroft's senior year). Our hero suffered a heart breaking overtime defeat.

dsterner gained a small measure of satisfaction during his senior year in high school when the Kennard Dale squad sent one Kirk Roycroft (younger brother of Lance) onto the mat to take on dsterner. The KD brain trust may have reasonably suspected that dsterner wouldn't know the difference. Nevertheless, dsterner was onto their scheme and recorded a 3rd period fall over the imitation nemesis.

And now the saga is rejoined. On Saturday, January 22 dsterner dropped a hard fought 7-5 decision to Ginter bringing his career mark to 0-3 against his new nemesis. The first encounter occurred during dsterner's sophomore year in high school (Ginter's senior year). In a physical mismatch, Ginter dispatched our hero like a dishrag, scoring a Technical Fall at 4 minutes by score of 16-0.

The 2nd encounter occurred in December, 2004 in a wrestling tournament hosted by Ursinus College. Our hero, being a freshmen, was unknown and unseeded in the 133 lb. field. He fought his way from the preliminary rounds to the semi-finals w/3 surprising victories to earn his shot at redemption. Ginter had enjoyed byes into the quarterfinal round where he had dispatched his opponent in less than a minute. Alas, trailing 3-2 midway through the 2nd stanza, our hero made a fatal error which did not go unobserved by his opponent. Ginter took full advantage and recorded a 2nd period fall.

In this most recent enounter, Ginter jumped to an early 5-0 lead on dsterner. Undaunted, our hero fought back viciously, but fell short in the end.

dsterner may get one or two more chances to slay his nemesis, although it's unlikely to happen again this season. The clock is ticking.

matisyahu

Just in case anybody's in the mood for something completely different musically, check this out. Matisyahu is a "Hasidic Reggae Superstar". Saw him on Carson Daily's late night show. Unbelievable!

Click here for audio samples.

Where is RPS when you need them.

Giving peace a try, I think the NHL and the NHLPA should get together. Here is one angry dead man.

What should be done with the Blue States?

Seeing, therefore, that an association of men who will not quarrel with one another is a thing which never yet existed, from the greatest confederacy of nations down to a town meeting or a vestry; seeing that we must have somebody to quarrel with, I had rather keep our New England associates for that purpose, than to see our bickerings transferred to others.

- Thomas Jefferson, 1798

O's big signings continue

The Orioles continue to multiply the number of impact players by signing Steve Reed.

Hey Boopadoop

I know you're looking forward to this.

Ever blow glass???

... cuz I now officially have! Woo hoo. We had two glass pipes, about a half an inch in diameter and we had to get the ends of the glass red hot. Meanwhile, glass doesn't conduct heat very well, so we just held on to the other ends of the pipes with our bare hands. I forgot to mention that you have to cork one end of one of the tubes. When they are red hot you push the ends together to make the intial joint. Then you get the joint red hot again and blow into the open end of the tube. The joint expands and the glass from each tube passes over top and below the other, then get the joint red hot again, repeat several times and there you go! You've now made a longer glass tube. And all of this was done for my inorganic chemistry class because we have to design vessels to hold certain reactions. More glass blowing instructions to follow.

O's making a statement

The Orioles have resigned Jerry Hairston, Jr. and Rodrigo Lopez. This brings the total number of impact players added to the roster this offseason to zero.

Human decency

Ninety-eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hard-working, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then--we elected them.
-- Lily Tomlin

"Kate from Boston" called

A chick I dated in college called during the Steelers game over the weekend.

She lives in Boston.

We "discussed" me spending a weekend up there.

What do I do. Suggestions welcome.

The Blog

The Blind Date

Scot, did you pitch a little woo?

More on why it's important to floss

Link to explanation.

Succinct Words on Communism

Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.
-- Frank Zappa

Chickens

How 'Bout Them Stillers?

That was a roller-coaster ride.

On to the AFC Championship Game!

Math

"Forty" is the only number in English, which, when spelled out, has all of its letters in alphabetical order.

Help Wanted

Apparently, Canada does not have enough pizza or strippers. Well, can any country ever really have enough of these commodities?

Knap

It may interest some of our members to hear that Knap means to break or shape stone such as flint. So as for Ozark, it is probably right, along with Eveo. Maybe me and Mike combined ARE smarter than uncle stan.!

WE LANDED ON THE MOON!!!

...okay, different moon and a couple of billion miles further away. Titan, actually, one of Saturn's moons. Can you imagin how many calculations had to be done to get a rocket there? Meanwhile, the pics coming back are in black and white, bummer. In the future the scientists involved should keep in mind that if they want public interest the pics will have to be in color... and high definition.

I feel so warm and fuzzy....

As bloggers, this is for us.

Tsunami Syd to strike Florida

Sydney is leaving Aruba for good. He's a svelte 248 lbs and he's "ready to rock". Hopefully, he won't have to get ready to "go to the Rock".

O's counter Yankees and Red Sox

Well, at least this guy isn't in trouble with the law.

Engagement News

One of my best friends, Kip Fedako, proposed to his girlfriend on Sunday. They're engaged.

I feel grown up.

I have a blind date tonight...

...with a chick that Jamie set me up with.

I wonder what she looks like.

Media Update

Can this be right?

Fineman says (among other things):

"Texas Gov. George W. Bush arrived on the national scene in the 1990s intent on dictating the terms of dealing with the AMMP — or simply ignoring it altogether."

As I recall, Clinton tried a similiar tactic in the first two years of his first administration. He thought he could bypass (to some degree) the MSM and use the internet to go directly to the public. In retrospect, this was a pretty ballsy move. Clinton got 'em caught in a ringer and ended up courting the MSM as had all of his predecessors. Perhaps the public wasn't ready for it, but just as likely a cause is that the internet wasn't ready for it.

I have always been ashamed of the Clinton Administration(s). I have always felt that Clinton had "no balls". Perhaps his 8 years in the White House would have suited me better if the MSM had not chopped 'em off in his first 2 years as President.

Elections

Why is it that all the voting "irregularities" that have surfaced since the 2000 national elections seem to be occurring in voting precincts run by the Democratic party? Does anyone know of voting "irregularities" that have been uncovered in voting precincts run by the Republican party?

I Feel Safe

The Year's best Headlines of 2004 (with some comments)

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
(No, Really?)

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
(now that's taking things a bit far!)

Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
(not if I wipe thoroughly!)

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
(what a guy!)

War Dims Hope for Peace
(I can see where it might have that effect!)

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
(you mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!)

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
(weren't they fat enough?!)

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
(tastes like chicken)

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
(Chainsaw Massacre all over again!)

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Rathergate

CBS: "I have here a document, authored in the past, by an individual now deceased, which definitively states that you are a bad person. How do you respond?"

Accused: "The document you reference was not authored in the past. It was authored recently. It was not authored by the individual you claim it to be as the technology employed to author this document did not exist during this individuals' lifetime."

Columbia Journalism Review: "Aha! That doesn't make you a good person."

NEWS.com.au | Long hair 'steals the brain's energy' (January 10, 2005)

NEWS.com.au | Long hair 'steals the brain's energy' (January 10, 2005): "Long hair 'steals the brain's energy'
From correspondents in Seoul
January 10, 2005

STALINIST North Korea has stepped up its campaign against long hair and untidy attire which its media says represents a 'corrupt capitalist' lifestyle, reports said.

North Korean state television, radio and newspapers have led the grooming drive, urging people to cut their hair short and to dress tidily, the BBC said in a dispatch citing broadcasts from Pyongyang.

Men were asked to have crew cuts with hair growing up to five centimetres in a twice-a-month visit to the barber, it said.

Not only health and hygiene but also intelligence was cited by the North Korean media as reasons for the crackdown on appearance.

Pyongyang television noted long hair 'consumes a great deal of nutrition' and could thus rob the brain of energy, according to the BBC."

NFL Coverage

Sometime during every NFL broadcast, it seems, we get a camera shot of a player who is not in the game, sitting on a stationary exercise bike, pedaling. La De Da!#$%&^^%(* This is not exciting. It is not interesting.

What is the value of this image? Are the broadcasters trying to tell me that there is something worthwhile happening off the field? "OoooWow..... Look here! A football player pedaling a stationary exercise machine on the sidelines. I didn't know they did that! Oh my, those zany football players. Always trying to get an edge. What will they think of next?"

If the stationary exercise machine is replaced with a motorcycle, I'm all for cutting away to that player just as he attempts to leap it over a dozen Greyhound buses. This endeavor is worthwhile. I am certain it would fire up the crowd and, if effected successfully at the proper moment, could swing momentum in favor of that players' team. Now that, would be an edge.

I hope the NFC (at least) undertakes this immediately . The NFC needs something. They've made no effort to produce any good football teams, at least make an effort to produce a good NFL broadcast.

Gay Rodeo

I was watching King of the Hill and they ended up at the gay rodeo. Haha, we thought. But no, Gay Rodeo had its beginnings in 1976 at the National Reno Gay Rodeo in Nevada. Over the next eight years local rodeo associations were formed in Colorado, Texas, California, and Arizona. In 1985, these four Gay Rodeo Associations along with Oklahoma founded the IGRA. From these beginnings, the IGRA has spread the Rodeo spirit and enthusiasm from Texas into Canada and from the West coast to the East coast.

Modern Education

How else is he gonna learn ?

While the Yankees sign Randy Johnson....

Tsunami Syd strikes again.

Batteries not Included....

I recently purchased an 8 pack of Duracell AA batteries. A free flashlight came with the purchase, unfortunately, there was not a battery included with the flashlight!

Coach Bill Cowher's "Twas the Night Before Christmas" - - - Steelers Style

Twas the night before Christmas, in a 'Burgh that I know.
The stadium was empty, and the lights did not glow.

The uniforms hung in the lockers with pride,
with the helmets, with emblems
on only one side.

The players and coaches had been gone for a while,
I sent them home early with a holiday smile.

So I cleared off my desk and was ready to leave,
to spend time at home on this Christmas Eve.

When out by the lockers I heard a loud clatter,
I ran from the office to see what was the matter.

I ran down the hall just as fast as can be,
and stopped at the door I was trying to see.

I heard some walking, some concern did this cause;
then I gasped when I saw, it was Santa Claus.

He was dressed not in red, but in gold trimmed with black;
and I watched as he pulled all the gifts from his sack.

Some fumbles, some picks, and some sacks for the "D,"
and a ball for Jeff Reed that flies as straight as can be.

The receivers got touchdowns, a long-bomb from Big Ben.
And yes, a defensive back for the BUS to smash in.

Every player and coach got a gift of some kind.
But what would he leave me? Lots of thoughts crashed my mind.

I watched as he carried his bag down the hall.
But he started to leave, and he left me nothing at all.

So with fire in my eyes, and spit on my lip,
I yelled 'cross the room, "hey man, what's your trip?"

"I watched as you gave all those gifts to my crew,
but you're giving me nothing, what wrong did I do?"

He turned to Coach Cowher, smiled, and said one thing:
"When you get to Jacksonville, you'll get your fifth Superbowl Ring!"

A Computer Science Lesson

There are 10 kinds of people in the world, those who know binary and those who don't.

NBA Update

Now for this, I'm willing to wave off the traveling violation.

Welcome

Free Advice welcomes Ken as the newest member of the Free Advice Blog team.

Ken is famous (if you Google "Ken", you get 27,200,000 hits!) and has been dispensing free advice for years, one of his many reliable bon mots being "Don't think, just hit". I have employed this advice many times (in fact, I'm using it right now) with results.

The value of Ken's addition to the team cannot be measured.

I invite the blogosphere to join me in welcoming Ken.

The Command Line In 2004

Updated version of Neal Stephenson's "In the Beginning There Was the Command Line" (78 pages). Worthwhile for those who care about such things. link

Help for the BCS

Now that the NCAA Division 1A Football Beauty Pageant is over, I suggest that "Free Advice" step up to the plate and create a ranking system for the BCS to take over for the now fleeing AP Poll.

We could actually take a poll and combine the scores like the AP or Coaches poll, or we could just randomly draw teams out of a hat. Probably have the same effect as the current system as we still don't know who the best team in Division 1A College Football is.

In lieu of free agent signings.....

Sydney Ponson Update

John Wayne

Tonight at 8pm AMC is airing the movie "The Quiet Man" starring John Wayne and Maureen O'Hara. The cast also includes Barry Fitzgerald, Victor McLaglen and Ward Bond. The movie was originally released in 1952, directed by John Ford and is one of my all-time favorite John Wayne movies. Barry Fitzgerald's performance is particularly entertaining.

Humility

What the world needs is more geniuses with humility, there are so few of us left.
-- Oscar Levant

from: quote of the day

Minnesota Association of Rogue Taxidermy [MART]

link

Modern Education

ACADEME, n. An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught.

ACADEMY, n. [from ACADEME] A modern school where football is taught.


- Ambrose Bierce (The Devils Dictionary)

Advice on Getting Stuff Done

Gotta Get My Stuff Done

(Requires Quicktime)

Go Rams

(And Steelers).

The Vikings look like they're laying an egg...

Welcome

Free Advice welcomes new contributors dsterner, jamie,mikey-p,scottie and vicki to the blogosphere.

Looks like it's going to be a big year for Free Advice.

Tires

Midget Rental Available

WARNING: Midget Phobia Symptions

Math

Why was six afraid of seven?

Because seven ate nine.

Poker

I won poker tonight. I'm really good.

Happy New Year

Just joined this site today. Happy New Year. I'll have more to say later.

Get Yer Free Advice right here

Free Advice welcomes Jeff and Mark as the latest members of the Free Advice blog.

Welcome Aboard!

Happy New Year!