Reporters Notebook (051708): "If Your Grandma Sees That, She'll Have a Conniption"

I was barely awake Sunday morning after entering Wenksville United Methodist Church when Pappy Pitzer greeted me with an astonished look.
“What’d you do to your hair?” asked Pap.
Great nuts.
“If your Grandma sees that,” Pap continued, “she’ll have a conniption.”
Grandma didn’t have what you would term a conniption — dictionary: a fit of hysterical excitement — but she did run a comb through my dirty blonde locks for three minutes.
I went to the barbershop Friday.
~ Scot Andrew Pitzer