On the Young

On Versatility

Is there anything they can't do?

Is it really you Santa?

REPORTERS NOTEBOOK (Gettysburg Times: 12/27/08) - "We like Aunt Sharon"

During our annual Christmas meal at the Mentzer household, I commented about Grandma’s delicious feast.
“This is great,” I exclaimed.
Uncle Jeff concurred.
“One of the best meals we’ve ever had,” he said.
That got me thinking.
“What’s your normal dinner?” I asked. “Pizza and Doritos?”
Uncle Jeff replied: “I don’t eat that stuff. My wife cooks me meat and potatoes every night.”
Oh really.
“Where’d you find a woman like that?” I asked.
The answer may surprise you.
“He had to go to Bermudian,” said Pappy Mentzer.
Aunt Sharon pounded the table and shot her eyes at me.
“PUT THAT IN YOUR PAPER!” she roared.
OK.
(We like her.)
~ Scot Andrew Pitzer

On the Season

Merry Christmas!

On the BCS Rankings

BCS DECLARES GERMANY WINNER OF WORLD WAR II
US Ranked 4th

After determining the Big-12 championship game participants the BCS computers were put to work on other major contests and today the BCS declared Germany to be the winner of World War II.

"Germany put together an incredible number of victories beginning with the annexation of Austria and the Sudetenland and continuing on into conference play with defeats of Poland , France , Norway , Sweden , Denmark , Belgium and the Netherlands . Their only losses came against the US and Russia; however considering their entire body of work--including an incredibly tough Strength of Schedule--our computers deemed them worthy of the #1 ranking."

Questioned about the #4 ranking of the United States the BCS commissioner stated "The US only had two major victories-- Japan and Germany . The computer models, unlike humans, aren't influenced by head-to-head contests--they consider each contest to be only a single, equally-weighted event."

German Chancellor Adolph Hiter said "Yes, we lost to the US ; but we defeated #2 ranked France in only 6 weeks." Herr Hitler has been criticized for seeking dramatic victories to earn 'style points' to enhance Germany 's rankings. Hitler protested "Our contest with Poland was in doubt until the final day and the conditions in Norway were incredibly challenging and demanded the application of additional forces."

The French ranking has also come under scrutiny. The BCS commented "France had a single loss against Germany and following a preseason #1 ranking they only fell to #2."

Japan was ranked #3 with victories including Manchuria, Borneo and the Philippines.

On Words

What's another word for Thesaurus?
- Steven Wright

2008 College Football - Week 15 Mentzer Rankings

Top 25 after Conference Championship games. Utah and Boise State are still undefeated, If Utah beats BAMA in the Sugar Bowl, they should be crowned the champs, but Florida or Oklahoma will get that honor. If Penn State and Ohio State win their bowl games, then it shows that the Big Ten got shafted. Big 12 South has 4 good teams, we will see how 2 of them do on the big stage in January. Enjoy...


Stand Team W L F1 W F1 L W/L F1
1 Utah 12 0 406 0 1.0000 1.0000
2 Boise State 12 0 393 0 1.0000 1.0000
3 Oklahoma 12 1 545 6 0.9231 0.9891
4 Texas 11 1 494 6 0.9167 0.9880
5 Texas Tech 11 1 400 6 0.9167 0.9852
6 Alabama 12 1 419 9 0.9231 0.9790
7 TCU 10 2 268 9 0.8333 0.9675
8 Brigham Young 10 2 233 11 0.8333 0.9549
9 Ohio State 10 2 381 18 0.8333 0.9549
10 Florida 12 1 559 28 0.9231 0.9523
11 USC 11 1 381 22 0.9167 0.9454
12 Penn State 11 1 415 27 0.9167 0.9389
13 Oklahoma State 9 3 262 18 0.7500 0.9357
14 Cincinnati 11 2 411 40 0.8462 0.9113
15 Ball State 12 1 341 35 0.9231 0.9069
16 Georgia 9 3 334 39 0.7500 0.8954
17 Michigan State 9 3 331 44 0.7500 0.8827
18 Oregon 9 3 244 38 0.7500 0.8652
19 Missouri 9 4 274 49 0.6923 0.8483
20 Pittsburgh 9 3 424 90 0.7500 0.8249
21 Air Force 8 4 204 49 0.6667 0.8063
22 Oregon State 8 4 288 74 0.6667 0.7956
23 Western Mich 9 3 233 63 0.7500 0.7872
24 Virginia Tech 9 4 412 114 0.6923 0.7833
25 Nebraska 8 4 217 61 0.6667 0.7806

63 Notre Dame 6 6 159 163 0.5000 0.4938

91 Michigan 3 9 107 250 0.2500 0.2997

120 Washington 0 12 0 384 0.0000 0.0000

2008 College Football - Week 14 Mentzer Rankings

Top 25 after week 14 which was a week ago. Conference Championships are not included in this ranking.

Stand Team W L F1 W F1 L W/L F1
1 Alabama 12 0 417 0 1.0000 1.0000
2 Utah 12 0 402 0 1.0000 1.0000
3 Boise State 12 0 389 0 1.0000 1.0000
4 Ball State 12 0 332 0 1.0000 1.0000
5 Texas 11 1 477 6 0.9167 0.9876
6 Oklahoma 11 1 465 6 0.9167 0.9873
7 Texas Tech 11 1 396 6 0.9167 0.9851
8 TCU 10 2 267 9 0.8333 0.9674
9 Brigham Young 10 2 232 11 0.8333 0.9547
10 Ohio State 10 2 370 18 0.8333 0.9536
11 Florida 11 1 462 27 0.9167 0.9448
12 USC 10 1 344 22 0.9091 0.9399
13 Penn State 11 1 410 27 0.9167 0.9382
14 Oklahoma State 9 3 249 18 0.7500 0.9326
15 Cincinnati 10 2 335 34 0.8333 0.9079
16 Georgia 9 3 332 36 0.7500 0.9022
17 Michigan State 9 3 327 44 0.7500 0.8814
18 Missouri 9 3 258 42 0.7500 0.8600
19 Oregon 9 3 232 38 0.7500 0.8593
20 Air Force 8 4 202 48 0.6667 0.8080
21 Boston College 9 3 356 87 0.7500 0.8036
22 Western Mich 9 3 218 54 0.7500 0.8015
23 Pittsburgh 8 3 341 89 0.7273 0.7930
24 Nebraska 8 4 214 57 0.6667 0.7897
25 Oregon State 8 4 270 72 0.6667 0.7895

61 Notre Dame 6 6 152 155 0.5000 0.4951

92 Michigan 3 9 107 247 0.2500 0.3023

120 Washington 0 11 0 341 0.0000 0.0000

REPORTERS NOTEBOOK: 120608 - "Call Mike"

My brother Michael has always been the medical expert in the family.
That’s why he’s currently in his third year at the Penn State-Hershey School of Medicine.
I’ll admit — I knew that Mike would excel in the medical field a long time ago.
When I was a junior in high school, I was having trouble passing health class. Mom had to help me study for a big exam.The questions were so hard, that I threw a temper-tantrum.
I couldn’t even get the easy questions correct.
“Scot,” I recall Mom saying, “if I was choking and couldn’t breathe, who would you call?”
I thought for a moment, before screaming: “MIKE!”
The correct answer was 9-1-1.
But frankly, I’d still call him first.
— Scot A. Pitzer

On Passion

From James Taranto in the Wall Street Journal Online:

"According to Tchaikovsky's Wikipedia page (which uses the Polish spelling of his name), "Despite his success as a pianist, Andrzej Czajkowski's greatest passion was composition."

Or at least it was until 1982, when he started decomposing."

On Expectations

Surely they all would still have been aboard otherwise.

On Gunfighting

This seems like good advice.